16 August 2005

I'm Back in Hawaii

Many thanks to Cranky Neocon fo' let your friendly local Hawaiian god guestblog on great, big site. Much mana at Cranky's site. Tiki learned much about blogging, including about TypePad. Must bring TypePad to islands, more people blog Hawaii. Bring mana to islands. To TikiPundit. Sending donation of 1000 ti leaves to Cranky as thanks. Cranky make much use of this on Mainland, get many good things in return.

Come back home, problems got people out in their yards complaining. Complaining at beach. Complaining at L&L Drive-in. Big problem Congress, Akaka Bill. You already know, some Hawaiians love it, some hate it. Dem dat love it, love to follow the $$$green$$$, my opinion. Cause nothing's gonna change here, except some of the locals get relief from the crazy cost of living. Then dem dat hate it, they don't want nothing to do with the USA because they think the land was stolen anyway. Big annex happen'. Very sad and mad, some of them. Even if they weren't alive and didn't unnastand cultural context at that time. This shows no respect to own ancestors, and that makes TikiPundit very angry. Make earthquakes. OK, miss slightly. But gonna get bettah.

Akaka Bill is stalled in the lofty halls of Congress, but has just gained blogmentum beyond the idol (false, non-Hawaiian idol), dat very smart Michelle Malkin. redstate.org is aware.

Redstate notices that 21 House Republicans put up a letter requesting that Akaka Bill not be scheduled for this Congressional session.

Grave concerns says Congressman about violate Constitution. Race-base government. Say Congress not allowed to designate group as "Indian tribe."

That definition whole prollem. Hawaiians not tribe o' Indians. Not live North America. Not wanna go deah. Come from Australasia long time befoah, go east, go northeast, stop Hawaii. Simple. Big boat, good navigation, lotta food. Easy breezy Hawaiian sailors 'n' navigators. Sometime go back too. Go back shopping tourist spots Fiji, Samoa, Tahiti. Then come back. Make big culture. Make big nation. But Stone Age. Not having forges. Not having metal. Make shark-tooth knife. Make human sacrifice to gods. Make TikiPundit happy.

But TikiPundit young in those days. Not have heiau. Not have temple. Not own taro fields. Very poor TikiPundit. Live alone on Molokai. Make own platform, d'ose days. Eat fish catch own self. No offerings. Not like today. TikiPundit revered. 'Cause TikiPundit only Hawaiian god know tech. Tiki got tech. Hi-tech. Got TiVo. Got truck. Got take-out. Got much mana. Took your local friendly Hawaiian god many years to get mana from those days.

Maybe not too bright, take 21 Congressman write wan lettah. Congressmen names: Steve King, Dana Rohrbacher, Jeff Flake, Louie Gohmert, Gil Gutknechtt, Virgil Goode, Ernest Istook, Lynn Westmoreland, Mike Pence, Jeb Hensarling, Dave Weldon, Chris Chocola, Tom Tancredo, Ron Paul, John Kline, John Duncan, Zach Wamp, Todd Akin, Charlie Norwood, Wally Herger, Scott Garrett. TikiPundit only hear wan name befoah: Tancredo & Rohrbacher.

What, Auntie? Two name? OK, stop hitting toppa head!

Someday, I will introduce you to Auntie. Big matriarch. Big fist, hit head when say something wrong. Not pronounce Hawaiian right because she wen got dentures. But bruddah, she can cook.


Blogger Gordon said...

Thank you, Tiki! BTW, you may want to send a note to the Instapundit. The Akaka bill is in the news and you've been all over it like a hot lava flow on... on... some Hawaiian land.

Blogger Kalroy said...

Back in Hawai'i?

I hate you.



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